I don’t know if I expected to awaken, enlightened. I don’t know if I expected to feel as though the work I am doing for myself is enough, simply because I am finally caring enough to do it. I don’t know if I expected to sudden love my body, my heart, my soul.
I don’t know if I expected to fall in love with my pillowy hips, with my exaggerated curves, with my nose which never quite seemed to fit my face. I don’t know if I expected to forget feeling like a worthless piece of shit. If I expected to forget being told that very thing. I don’t know if I expected to roll over as he slept, and be filled with feeling worthy of him. (more…)
In fairness, I don’t suppose we’re strangers. In fairness, I suppose if you have stumbled upon me here, in one way or another you know me as well as many in my day to day.
In fairness, just because we haven’t met, I don’t suppose we’re really strangers. I realize I take risks by putting myself out there, in this forum. I realize it seems brave, or honest or big. It may be some of those things, or none of those things, or all of those things. It may be foolhardy to expose these tender secrets to the prying eyes of people I don’t know. (more…)
The thing that sucks about being a “survivor” is the process of survival. The process of getting up and living and working and being in the face of something horrendous.
While the terror is far gone, the aftermath lives on. I am half life, sometimes. Like those big, snorting, three tusked boars that walk around Chernobyl feasting on toxic grass. I have survived, but don’t know how and sometimes, don’t know why. (more…)
I know, I need to lighten the hell up around here. I’ve done that for my friend Dawn. Go visit and say hello, won’t you?
But the truth is, friends, I am going through it.
News from the neuro is, not terrible. I am a “classic migraineur”. Seriously, is that a word? But apparently while am classic, I am also severe. In case, you know, I didn’t know that. I like this doctor, as he’s given me some natural alternatives as well as medication to combat the headaches when they hit. Which, thankfully, are no longer daily. Amen. (more…)
What they don’t tell you is that you will be cold. You will be cold when you go into the room, dressed in their spare scrub pants. You will be cold, there in your bare feet and your lavender shirt, which clashes with their spare scrub pants. They are blue. Like your toes, because you are cold and they didn’t tell you.
They didn’t tell you that you would have to take off your rings, until you got into a small, but stylish room. So you walk in, naked fingered cradling your arms close to your chest, which is without a bra. Another thing they could have told you. (more…)
My Grandfather’s bible is a wonderful thing. A holy thing, of curled and gold edged pages. King James, and underlined. Leafed through and notated and well used. Well loved.
My Grandfather, a tall man, a gentle man, with a voice that was strong and real and devastating. He spoke truth in the tone of pure love. He spoke truth in a lilting and glorious tumble of biblical fire. I could feel the fire of his voice lick at my toes as he spoke, raise goosebumps on the back of my neck.
A simple ” I love you” was divine scripture. (more…)
Sometimes, I think, he likes to see me cry.
Sometimes it feels like he does it on purpose. Then, other times, in the tumbling waves of our turbulent conversations a topic comes up and grasps me; unaware.
This particular topic never fails to leave me a mess. I am unable to completely control the tear flow. I cry, looking away from him, from my stone lady in whom I almost always seek solace. I look out the glass door to the parking lot, watching people drive to separate lives from mine. Yet, he never looks away from me. (more…)
Vrei sa scapi de rozatoare sau te-ai saturat de gaurile in gazon? Sau te-ai saturat ca rozatoarele sa-ti strice culturile pe camp? Atunci ar trebui sa cumperi un aparat anti rozatoare cu ultrasunete. Dispozitivul anti rozatoare functioneaza cu o baterie solara pe principiul unui emitator cu ultrasunete. Dispozitivul produce si propaga in jurul sau valuri sonore, care provoaca rozatoarelor un sentiment de anxietate si disconfort, si, in acelasi timp le obliga sa paraseasca zona de actiune a aparatului. Astfel, pe o suprafata de aproximativ 650 de metri patrati, terenul va fi fara daunatori. (more…)
Want to change network providers but keep your phone? We show you how to unlock and Android phone and use any SIM.
If you’re thinking about changing carrier or network provider, you might be concerned about using a different SIM in your phone. That’s because some phones are locked to a particular provider, preventing the use of a SIM card from a different network. If your phone is locked and you try to use a different SIM, you won’t be able to use your minutes, texts or data. Here, we show you how to unlock your phone and use any SIM with imei unlock
If you’re here looking for how to unlock your phone because you’ve forgotten your password, pin or passcode, click here. (more…)
We all know that it is fun to eat your dinner in front of your TV, but more and more studies reveal; that if you want to lose weight, you should eat your dinner slowly at the kitchen table. Forcing yourself to focus on your food can pay off in a pretty huge way.
In every single study that has been made regarding this issue, every people managed to lose weight if they focused on the food. The first thing you need to do in order to lose weight is to load up your plate with plant-based proteins such as beans. You should also challenge yourself to make meals last for at least 20 minutes. Another great idea is to ask yourself if you want to eat because you are stressed. (more…)